Sunday, January 31, 2010
1. Grab the nearest book to you, turn to page 18 and find line 4. What does it say?
"opportunities to gather in groups to share, laugh,"
- Party with a purpose - Pat Pearson, M.S.S.W.
2. Before you started this survey what were you doing?
Adding bleach to our crappy dishwasher and reading blogs
3. With the exception of the computer what can you hear?
The T.V. and the men folk discussing what the next step is for finishing the new nursery. (FINALLY!!!!)
4. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
Last night. We came home from playing Warhammer 40K at a friends house.
5. Do you usually remember your dreams?
6. When did you last laugh?
7. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
A Currier & Ives clock, a thai inspirations wall sconce from PartyLite, and a key holder.
8. What is the last film you saw?
9. If you moved to another state where would you go?
I would choose florida
10. Tell me something about you that most people don't know.
I can twitch my nose like Samantha from Bewitched. (Much better than Nicole Kidman EVER did in the movie ramake IMHO)
11. Do you like to dance?
Not really, but onlybecuase I can't.
12. Would you ever consider living abroad?
If I could choose the destination, yes.
13. What is the last thing you downloaded on your computer?
The ducky border for the previous post.
14. Type of music you like most?
Depends on my mood. I typically listen to a lot of different things as evidence by my music player on this page.
15. Type of music you dislike most?
I think that it might be called Death Metal.
16. Are you listening to music right now?
17. If you could change something about your home what would it be?
Get a basement, remodel the kitchen, remodel the back room, Create a mudroom
18. What was the last thing you bought?
Coconut M&M's and a diet root beer
19. Have you ever driven a motorcycle?
20. Would you go bungee jumping or sky diving?
21. Do you have a garden?
No, the dogs would dig it up. I want one SO bad though.
22. Do you really know all the words to the National Anthem?
23. What is the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning?
I am SOOOO tired!!! Why couldn't (insert Monkey or Mouse here) have slept in?
24. If you could eat lunch with one famous person, who would it be?
Dead - Brandon Lee
Alive - Fergie or Taylor Swift
25. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card?
Probably the Contaier Store or Pier One.
26. What time is bedtime?
For Monkey, 8:30p.m. Me: Whenever Mouse decides she is ready for bed...typically 11:30.
27. How many tattoos do you have?
One and looking for more.
28. If you don't have any, have you ever thought of getting one?
29. Who was the last person you ate dinner with?
30. Is the glass half empty or half full?
Depends on the day
31. Are you a good cook?
Oh, God no! I would like to say that I am learning though.
32. Do you know how to pump your own gas?
Yes. Though, the huz does it for me whenever we are together.
33. Do you touch type?
If that means typing without looking at the keys, then yes. If it doesn't, then I have no clue!
34. What time do you get up?
Depends on Monkey and Mouse. Sometimes 3:00, something 4:30, then almost always at 6:30 or 7:00am. All after going to bed at 11:30 or later!!!!
35. What is your favorite time of the day?
36. Where did you grow up?
Three tiny towns in MO
37. How far do you live from there now?
I actually still live in one of them
38. What are some of the different types of jobs you've had in your life?
Dispatcher & 911 Operator, Pricing Administrator, Fireworks Technician, Waitress, Pharmacy Tech, E.M.T., SAHM
39. What is most important in life?
Friday, January 29, 2010
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
I think that it is absolutely amazing that they have built entire communities using nothing but old shipping containers. Some of them don’t even look like containers when they are done. It seems to be something that has been much more popular in London than it is here. I don’t know why the U.S. hasn’t caught onto this trend, but I think it would be a great way to not only provide an alternative to cookie cutter living spaces, but to be green at the same time. Things like this just amaze me.
I always wonder what kind of imagination the people who come up with ideas like this had as children. I know that my imagination now is nowhere near a place where I could look at an old shipping container and think “I bet people could live there.” I totally want to go take a tour of one of the container cities now. (Guess I should inform the huz that I want to take a vacation to Mexico or London)
I am also amazed by Kit homes. I’m a dork, I know it. Don’t judge. Just accept it and move on.
Monday, January 25, 2010
I used to get it right when I started skating again. If I didn't stop and try to work it out, it would eventually pull all the way up my leg to my knee. It's frustrating to say the least. So, I think that if I don't find a good pair of shoes soon, I might have to make the 30 day Shred into something that is going to last a little longer. We will see. For now I am going to do my best to stick with it.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
I have been working out for 7 days without wearing shoes and my bad knee is starting to feel it. I have one pair of shoes that
We have yet to sit down and plan out the menu for our venture into Menu planning even though I keep "suggesting" that we need to. If we don't talk about it by Tuesday, I am planning it myself which I hate to do. If you have been reading my blog for any length of time, you will know that I am not a cook. The huz does all of the cooking. My cooking repertoire extends to baking a turkey, White Castle stuffing, Chili, and hot wing dip. Not the best items, but at least I can do a few things. Though, not enough to start doing a weekly meal plan.
Also, today is Mouse's 2 month birthday. It is so hard to believe that my Christmas baby turned thanksgiving baby is already 2 months old. Of course, in 6 days I will be saying the same thing about my little monkey. She will be 20 months. Time flies when they are little and I am so blessed to be able to be a SAHM.
Friday, January 22, 2010
I had only been in her life for the past 11 years or so, but she was special to me. She was very sweet and could be quite sassy. She was also one of those grandmas that you never knew what she was going to say. She liked to keep people guessing. It was always a joy to see her at family gatherings. As she started to get less and less steady on her feet, I would always try to help with moving her and she would always tell me "Jeannie, you're so sweet". Little did she know that I didn't do it because I was trying to be sweet. I did it because it is in my blood. Helping people is in every fiber of my being. It's what I do. It is what I have been trained to do and it just happens automatically. Helping her with such a small task as sitting in a chair at Christmas was my pleasure. I may not be good at much, but I am good at that and it meant a lot that she knew it.
I regret that she never got to meet Autumn. For some reason I have this weird thing where I think that it is very important for grandparents and great grandparents to meet new children. I don't know if I am hoping that their years of wisdom will rub off on the baby or if they will pass on some secret code that will tell them how to live a fulfilling life. I know that she can see her now, but it's not the same.
Grandma Rose, thank you for letting me into your life for a brief moment. You touched my heart and I will always remember you. Please watch over us as you wait to meet with us again. I, selfishly, must as one or two more favors of you. Please hold Ember's donor angle close to you and whisper sweet songs of joy in his/her ear. Tell her angel that we love her/him. Also, if you see my Grandma Hill, tell her I love her. Until we meet again....I love you. We love you.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
I really do think that I am making at least a little bit of progress endurance wise. (It's either that or the many times I had to stop last night to give little mouse back her paci. Yes, she uses a paci - don't judge me) I actually made it through the first two sets on jumping jacks!!! For the first time ever without stopping. Again, I cannot begin to tell you how excited I am about this. Though, I did have to stop several other times for fear of my lungs bursting. Even as I am sitting here typing, my arms are shaking begging me for mercy and I LOVE it. Am I a glutton for punishment or what?
It's just that I can feel that this is actually making my body work and it's great. It is the first time in a long time that this has happened for me. I don't even think I hurt this bad when I started derby not so many years ago. Though, let me tell you rink rash hurts worse that this ever could. Especially when it leaves the fishnet stocking imprint on your but cheek. OW!
Tomorrow is going to be a full day and we will be out of the house for most of it. Yay! We have to go to Children's, then to Sam's for formula, then maybe to the mall for a nice little stroll. After the huz gets home we eat and then I work out. It seems to work a little better if I do it at night rather than in the middle of the day. We are also going to work on doing Menu Planning this weekend. Thanks so much to Lori for suggesting it. I am excited to see how it works for us.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Now if you put one on her, she will wear it for a few hours at a time. She has also started to wear the cute little crocheted hat that I bought her.
Oh! And I did the Shred for today too. I am going to go die now.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
As much as I didn't want to because of how sore I am, I did the workout again today. I am sure that I ended up stopping more this time than I did yesterday, but it felt good to work all of my sore muscles. That is, until about two hours ago when I realized that I can't walk down the two steps into the garage. Yes, walking down stairs is much harder than walking up then right now. You use a whole different set of muscles and when they are sore, they sure as hell let you know it. I am motivated at this point in time to keep this going. In the first part of the DVD, I always have to stop in the middle of the jump rope part. It is just too much on my feet and shins. I REALLY don't want to end up with shin splints. I had them a lot in track and it was hell. Well, when you get to the end of the DVD, you do 2 minutes of cardio. This includes the jump rope part. Yesterday I didn't stop because I wanted to prove I could do it and I did the same today. I don't know if by then I am worked up enough to push myself or what, but it feels like such an accomplishment to make it through those 30 seconds of torture!
I would agree with anyone that tells me that Jillian Michaels is a master at torture. However, after the results I received after just one 20 minute session I would also have to thank her. If this continues, I can see how this could truly help me. Now, the diet is another story. I really need to work on it, but it is just going to have to wait until it is time to go grocery shopping again. Not a lot of healthy stuff in the house right now. I had pizza for lunch and and then a little later had a small pouch of Ember's fruit snacks. Just before dinner I ate a bag of baked Cheetos's and then had a piece of pizza. I was SO hungry. The huz did fix me a great dinner though. It is actually a Weight Watcher's recipe. It is a modification of hot wings where you use chicken breasts, cut them up into strips, and then use hot sauce on them. They are actually pretty good. Especially for someone who LOVES hot wings. He also made this whole grain rice mix that was pretty good. It was only 3 carb choices for me. (45 carbs total for the whole meal) Oh! I also only had three diet sodas today. Usually I have a bazillion and one throughout the day. I guess that is progress.
Now, we will see how I feel tomorrow. They always say that the third day is the worst. Let's hope. In one of my more pain filled moments the huz said "Hey, you only have 28 more days to go." At that moment I wanted to jump on him like a spider monkey and just smack him! However, my sore thighs told me that this was not an option. So, I politely told him to shut it. :) He loves me. He knows it. hehe
Monday, January 18, 2010
So, I sent out a tweet and a status on facebook asking if anyone knew what would be better to do, the P90 system or the 30 Day Shred. Then, low and behold, my step mother in law said that she actually had the 30 day shred DVD. So, right then and there the decision was made. Why not try the one that I don't have to buy? I had watched several snippets of both systems on-line and still didn't know if I could really do it or not. The more I thought about it, the more I decided that this was it. This needed to be it. Around 2PM I made the huz go over and pick it up because I knew that if I didn't decide to start now, it wouldn't happen. So, today was officially day 1......
And today is the day that I realized that Jillian Michaels and her workout might kill me rather than make me thin. OMG!! I was jelly legged 1/3 of the way through the 20 minutes. I knew that I was out of shape, but good lord! I had to stop several times throughout the video, but I was determined to at least finish. Which, I did. One of the main problems I had was that my feet started cramping when I had my shoes on. Once I took them off, they gradually got better. I am not really sure why they do that, though I have a feeling that it is simply my weight. I also had an issue with the fact that when I jumped up and down my flab was very distracting. I'm a big girl and the belly is not a fun thing when jumping.
One of the other issues I had is that I kept moving to one side or the other when doing jumping jacks. If we had a large space for me to do this in, this wouldn't be a problem. However, I have almost no space. I kept running into the couch, worrying about hitting the ceiling fan with my hands, and running into the hubby who was sitting in the chair behind me. I was very nervous doing this in front of him, but the baby needed to be fed and I needed to start right then and there, so he got the full view. Once I was done with the workout, I was so shaky and jelly armed/legged that I was afraid I wouldn't be able to get Ember out of her crib after nap time. Luckily she woke up before the huz had to leave for his evening job.
I did take the day 1 pictures (which are NOT going to be posted yet - I'm working up to it, just give me time) and weighed myself. We are also getting ready to do my measurements. I am truly hoping that this is going help. I'm not sure whether it will or not since I am not sure how to change my diet completely. So, we will see. I will check in tomorrow to let you know how I feel. Probably VERY sore. I can already feel myself starting to tighten up.
As far as today goes, I lived. There's always tomorrow. :)
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Someone much smarter than I am must have the answers to these questions. It's not really a secret that I have a hard time believing in myself. A lot of the time it really only has to do with my body image. It's also no secret that I am on the larger side of the female population and I am sure that this has a lot to do with that image. I never feel like I am as large as I am until I see a picture of myself, go shopping, or hear someone who is impossibly skinny talk about how fat they are. It kind of makes me think, "Wow...if they think they are fat, I must be grotesque." I have always felt this way. Even when I was thin. Man........was I ever thin and beautiful?! (Really not trying to brag, but compared to now that is what I see)
Even though I have a hard time believing in myself, I have always tried to do a better job of it. I never really got the hang of it. I know that most of the people that know me would say that I am very confident. And I try to be on the outside, but inwardly I'm not. Inwardly I constantly think about what people think of me or how they perceive me. It's such a vicious cycle. I have started to get over this VERY little by little. I have started to recognize things that I can and cannot change. I am also trying to learn how to look past these feelings. It is very hard for me, but I truly want to be in that "Others" group whoever they may be. I want to be a victor rather than a failure.
I have a few big decisions, that may or may not make it to the blog, to make over the next few days and I truly want to choose to be victorious. In doing so, I have been trying to take steps towards changing my body image. That includes trying to exercise. Whether it just be that extra trip up and down the hallway while I am at home with the girls or trying to get over to my parents house to use the Wii Fit. (Sorry Wii Fit trainer, I have been lax the past week. The girls and I have been sick! Please don't yell at me!) I have also started read motivational and inspirational material. This is something that I've never really done before. I never thought that it was for me. However, I think that it is helping me find more of the inner peace that I need to stay committed to certain things. Including housework and trying to lose weight. Which, ultimately will help me to improve my body image.
So, if you are part of this "Others" group, please let me know how you did it. I'd love to learn. I would like to say that I am going to choose to be a victor, but I don't know quite how. For now, I will just say that I am going to try my hardest.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
The post that I am talking about was titled Normal and it can be found here.
Since Autumn has been born, pleople have asked me if she is a normal baby or if she is having any problems like Ember had. People ask me all the time how Ember is doing now and if she is normal or if our life has returned to normal again.
So, again, I find myself asking....What is normal?
Normal for us is looking into those beautiful eyes and not seeing one ounce of yellow.
Normal is a round belly just because some babies actually have round bellies.
Normal is still checking her temperature constantly because she feels warm even though she doesn't have a fever.
Normal for Ember is going to Children's once a month for labs to make sure LuLu the liver is still happy.
Normal is not having to see the liver team for 6 months.
Normal is knowing that my baby isn't sick anymore, but she still has the potential to become very sick, very quickly.
Normal is 1 medication in the morning and two at night without a fight.
Normal is knowing that Ember is stronger than anyone I have ever met.
Normal is newborn jaundice with levels that were actually higher than Ember's ever were.
Normal is still love. Even more love than I thought I could ever feel.
Normal is still fear. Even more fear than I thought I could ever feel.
Normal is two happy, healthy babies to brighten the day.
Normal is calling the pediatrician and liver team a bazillion times in the course of two days because one of both of the girls is sick just to make sure that everyone is on the same page.
Even though Ember's scars are healed and covered up, I know they are still there.
Normal is still feeling my heart break for all liver babies, especially those that have been called away.
Normal is waiting for Autumn to turn 11 weeks. One more day than Ember was when she had her first surgery.
Normal is praying and hoping beyond all hope that my second baby will never, ever have to go through anything like what her sister has gone through. Yet, praying that she will find it in her heart to be just as sweet and compassionate.
Normal is wondering what milestones will come for Autumn before, at the same time, or after they came for Ember.
Normal is wondering if this baby will crawl before she walks because she won't have an enlarged liver or spleen to stop her.
Normal is the shock of how emotional I was in November when talking to people about Ember's transplant anniversary. Especially in front of a large group of Partylite consultants.
Normal is watching my two babies create a silent bond that even I, as their mommy, will never be able to understand.
Normal is still talking about poo.
Normal is most definitely waiting. Waiting for Autumn to grow into a little person. Waiting for Ember to discover something new and exciting. Waiting for my girls to become the best of friends...I think I am starting to like this whole waiting thing.
Normal is still being strong and determined, but now it is to guide them both through this life. Being strong and determined to help them turn into strong, beautiful, and compassionate people.
Normal is two beautiful smiles that brighten my day no matter how bad it is. Normal is absolutely not what I expected.
So, is Autumn a normal baby? Is Ember a normal baby now? No, my girls are extraordinary babies. Is our life normal again? It always has been normal. Again, it may not meet your definition of normal, but it meets ours.
Monday, January 11, 2010
You know that I love you. You know that I like to curl up in the chair with a cover and have you curl up with me. You are so warm and cuddly. However, there are times when I just can't help but hate you. Here are a few examples as to why we have this love/hate relationship...
Why must you try to sleep between your father and I when you know that you are just going to get kicked out of bed? You don't need covers. You don't even like covers so why steal them in the middle of the night?
The dogs are not new. They have been here for at least 6 years. So, why, bedtime (every night) do you always make one or both of them try to "get" you from the confines of their cage? It only forces you to run down the hall at break neck speed like you are running for your life. Did I mention that the dogs were in cages?
Need I remind you that you are 19 pounds? You could stand to use a few so please, please, please do not meow incessantly when the clock strikes 9:30p.m. on the dot. Trust me, you are not going to starve to death if you don't get food in your bowl until 9:35p.m.! Speaking of feeding time, what is up with the drinking of the water? Why, oh why can't you drink water from YOUR water bowl? It is new, fresh water. You watched me fill the bowl! Please refrain from meowing at me at 6A.M. because above mentioned dogs have not been let out yet just so you can drink from their water bowls. And especially please STOP licking the spout of the humidifier that just so happens to be right outside the bedroom door! Especially at 3a.m.!!! When the house is quiet it sounds like someone is trying to get in the kitchen window.
While there are many more items I could suggest, I thought we could start small and work or way up to bigger, better things.
Now, if you could please listen to these few
Your fairly annoyed, yet loving owner
Sunday, January 10, 2010
As of this past week I have officially starting having periods again. Can I just express again how much I HATE this part of being a woman? It just makes me wish I was preggo again. I LOVE not having a period! Not to mention that I actually don't mind being preggo, but that isn't something that is in the plans again, at least not for awhile. Anyway, I am back to the routine of feeling gross and having aching lady bits for 4-5 days every month or so. I say "or so" because since I have PCOS and had fertility problems when trying to get preggo with Ember, I don't know if I will commune with Mother Nature once a month or every three months again. So, we will wait and see.
Anyway, awhile back I discovered this great product made by Always. It is called the Always Infinity pad. Let me tell you, these things are amazing!!!! If you have a heavy period all of the time like I do, these are for you. I don't know what this infinicil stuff that these things are made out of is exactly, but it is worth it's weight in gold!!! I can't remember a time when I didn't have trouble wearing a pad or tampon. They would last an hour tops and I would have to change. It is just horrible for me. So, you can see why (on top of many, many other reasons) I hate this time of the month. Mother Nature truly is a cruel, mean woman! These pads are lifesavers. I no longer feel like I have to constantly run to the bathroom to check for leaks.
I do have to say that I actually turn them around to wear them though. I use the back as the front because that is where I tend to have most of my "flow". I don't know if it is because I am a plus sized girl or what, but for some reason the back never needs to be the widest. I can tell you that I use the overnights all day long just because my flow is that heavy. Since I have found these pads, I feel a little more normal during my time with Mother Nature. They are SUPER thin too. It really doesn't even feel like I am even wearing a pad most of the time. I can't express enough how great this is for me. I highly encourage anyone who needs that little bit of extra protection to try this product.
I was going to link to the free sample on the Always website for anyone who was interested, but due to such high demand they are not giving them out right now. However, you can still follow the link to the Always site and sign up for their newsletter. Just click on the Try it free button and you will be directed to the newsletter sign up. It gives you exclusive samples and coupons which is a great deal too. I am always in the market for coupons. Plus, it is not just for the Always products. It is for other items that Procter & Gamble makes as well. I know that I am always looking for deals and coupons on products so I thought I would share the love.
Friday, January 8, 2010
I do feel some sort of accomplishment that I have my own business. This is something that is mine and I will only get out of it what I put into it. I am very pleased that I can work when I want to rather than when I have to. It fits my schedule. Especially with staying home with the girls and with Matt working so much. It has been a great help to our family so far as well. I know that people are always waiting for the catch, but with Partylite there truly isn't one. It is free to start (major bonus for me since I was not working when I started selling) and they sell quality products. Through Partylite I have also met some wonderful and inspirational people. I know that it is helping me to be both a better person and better at my business.
I absolutely love to give back to people. Ask anyone who knows me and they will, hopefully, tell you that it's true too. The opportunity to sell Partylite is the single most rewarding thing that I can offer anyone. Especially someone who is struggling to make ends meet. I know that it may seem hard or scary or time consuming, but it's all worth it. Plus it's not hard or time consuming. It was a bit scary at first because I do get a bit self conscious standing up in front of people talking, but once you start getting your paychecks, it becomes fun! I mean, where else can you make $800 to $1,000 a month for working just about 12 to 18 hours?!!! Plus there are all kinds of incentives that I always try to take advantage of. I have received some great product for free!!!! I can't imagine working with a better group of people or a better company. Here's to a great, candle, and food filled 2010! If you need anything at all, I'm your girl!
I have posted a few pictures of some of my favorite items right now.
Weathered Zinc Lantern